Respect

Why do I never get any respect from the people around me.  Not the basic courtesy one extends to a human being, let alone the respect you should accord a friend.

I had proposed a plan to do something with my friends.  All but one agreed and wanted to do it.  I also asked everyone for schedules so that I could organize it.  No one followed through.  Again.  This is not an isolated incident.  Time and time ago I practically have to force my friends to spend time with me.  Why do I have to constantly push and push and push to get them to do something they said they wanted to do?  Now, this weekend we were planning on getting together.  I thought, hey we are all going to be together anyway, why don't we do this then?  Only to be told that everyone had already done it.  Even though they had agreed to do it together.  I'm the only asshole waiting, holding to the agreement.  Naturally I'm hurt and upset, they broke their word and didn't even have the decency to tell me.  One, eventually, agreed that I was right and apologized.  But otherwise I've gotten a whole slew of excuses, including people trying to tell me its my fault.  I mean, since when is it ok to break your word to Anyone, let alone a friend you supposedly care about, because you "forgot".  Yes, I was told that I shouldn't be upset because they forgot we had made plans.  Yeah, that made me feel better.  Now, not only did they break their word to me, they also forgot me.  Makes me feel really special.  And I love being told that I'm "over reacting", and that they don't need to apologize because its "not a big deal".  Well maybe its not to them, but it is to me.  Imagine if you were a very devout christian.  And then one of your friends who is not as devout or maybe not christian, serves you a burger on friday.  And then tells you "its not a big deal, its just a burger."  (For those who don't know, eating meat on a friday is a sin in most christian religions).  It may not be a big deal to the one person, but its a very important thing to the other.  All I want is to be given a little basic respect.  I get no respect from the people around me or from my family.  But I expect more from my friends, and I don't think that is asking too much.  I don't expect them to be perfect.  But when you make a mistake, when you hurt someone, owe up to it, take responsibility and apologize.  Don't try to weasel out of it, or shift the blame elsewhere.  Just apologize, sincerely.  If you don't understand, ask me to explain.  And listen when I do.  I do this for them.  I don't think its too much to ask that it be done for me in return.